It seems we automotive enthusiasts owe a great debt to Ludwig Prandtl, a Bavarian scientist whose studies into airflow theory became the foundation for what we now know about aerodynamics, drag, and streamlining. The story goes that students of his rather mockingly applied his calculations to bumble bees and ended up declaring them theoretically unable to fly. (Another version is that a Swiss scientist drafted up the argument for fun during a dinner party. Oh, those cheeky scientists!) Nearly a century later, a Cornell physicist cleared the whole thing up. The bees, meanwhile, remained generally unperturbed.
Similarly, everything about the BMW 1 series, a car introduced eight years ago as an entry level 5-door hatch, shouldn’t add up to a model the German brand would induct into their prestigious M Club. Yet in doing so, BMW has developed a standard-setting car that we will be talking about for years.
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In 2008, the 1 Series graced our shores with the 135i 2-door coupe and the 128i convertible, leaving the real-wheel drive hatchback (Which. Would. Have. Been. Awesome.) with our overseas contemporaries. With its stubby tail and simplistic power layout, the 135i was the demure alternative to the aggressive and complex 3 Series. The 3.0L twin turbo i6 produced a very satisfying 300 hp, and made for a very subtle yet speedy coupe. BMW recognized the potential in this little package and developed a concept, the 1 series tii (turismo internationale, injection), an experiment of weight reduction and aerodynamic tweaks for superior handling. You’ve seen it before: the white coupe with an unpainted carbon fibre hood and an off-center racing stripe streaking across the top. That could very well have been the 1 Series’ sole foray into the performance world, but lo, the “house of M” saw that it was good, and its latest coupe was born.
If anything, the 1 Series has certainly become uglier with the M. Its snouty face has only been accented with the addition of the flared air ducts in the front and air curtains to stream air around the wheels for better stability. The hips have been blown out as well to accommodate the wider track. No sunroof for the sporty coupe, so the heavy components are replaced by the standard metal roof, lowering the center of gravity. You can also have any color you like so far as it’s sapphire black, alpine white, or the exclusive Valencia orange.
…Be Sure To Show Your Work
So the intake is better and the stance is more aggressive, but that can’t be the end of the changes. After all, breathing strips do not an athlete make. Under the hood, it retains the 3.0 liter i6 twin turbo, improved with direct injection and M-configured power mapping that provides an overboost function to increase the torque another 37-lb-ft of torque at a full load. This brings the power output to 335 hp, and all this fury barks out of M-specific dual exhausts. The coupe comes strictly with a 6-speed manual designed for high-torque engines and an extremely short M gearshift lever. DSC (dynamic stability control) is still present, as is ABS, but added is the MDM, the M dynamic mode, which opens vents and eases off the electronic monitoring.
When I finally batted enough car enthusiasts away from the car, I climbed in and found the interior to be as simple as the 135i, but with a manual transmission and a big shiny M staring at me on the steering wheel. “Press me,” the M seemed to beckon and, being the gentleman that I am, could only oblige. The M, it seems, is the “smile button.”
BMW claims a 0-60 of 4.7 seconds, but the car itself has no instrumentation to track this and the journalist behind the wheel is so caught up in the drive, he couldn’t care less. First gear is a short dry fuse that makes second explode in your right hand while third gear prepares to ignite next in this series of firecrackers. My foot, completely unhindered by the gossamer-like clutch pedal, is still barely fast enough to keep up with each shift. The exhaust bellows through the woods as the car whips past rural homes. I don’t want to be gentle with this car; it’s a toy, not a collector’s piece. I want to manhandle it. I take it to the track.
Dial M For….
I’ll let you in on a little secret: I have mutant weather-controlling powers. I can make it rain buckets by 1) merely considering a trip to the car wash, or 2) going to a track. I am not exaggerating when I say that whenever I’ve show up at a track with intent to drive, it dumps rain. If/when I get the chance to attend the inaugural Formula 1 race in Austin next year and it rains, I will be immolated on a pyre by the Ferrari team to appease the all-powerful divinities. At Monticello, it’s been a rainy morning and an earlier track incident has further put the fear of God in me. As enthusiastic as I was the day before, I’m just as nervous now. This is my first trip to the course and I had grown accustomed to the transition of the high speed banked straights of Pocono raceway that spill into the chunky infield course. This is a new, honest to goodness, race-worthy track with elevations, high speed turns, sharp bends, and flat out belters.
Mercifully the sun emerges, drying the track significantly by mid-afternoon. I spent the morning taking leisurely granny-laps around the field to familiarize myself with the course, to which I can say a bad day at the track is still a hell of a great day. When I take the 1 Series M out, the experience is everything you want it to be. In other cars, be them more powerful, or even race oriented, they offer no forgiveness in a slow shift or a late entry into a bend. The BMW doesn’t ask for such a delicate touch, but it will reward it. Taking hold of the meaty steering wheel, what you do in a turn is up to you. Cock it up? Muscle your way out of it. Take it smooth? The 1 series will glide through. Between bouts of hooting in amazement, I occasionally looked at the dash cluster to watch the traction control light flip out like a tased protestor, but no matter how much I wrenched the car into place or bounced off a rumble strip, there was no sense of interference. I was putting up consistent lap times of “who gives a shit?” The numbers in this car are irrelevant because it’s too much fun to care.
The 1 Series M is a well-balanced and surprising treat from BMW, so much so that they upped the limited release of the car to make more units for the public to get their hands on it. Any criticism I have, apart from its pug-faced looks, would be that as a daily driver, its sportiness would be less than comfortable, not to mention how unbearable it would be to resist screaming around every hint of a corner that you see. Get the 1 Series M, get a helmet, head to the track, and leave the math at home.
Words By – Alex Kalogiannis
Photos By – Jon Rouzier
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